Family Time at the Beach

We are having a blast at our annual family beach trip! We go for the week after Christmas with my family. There are 9 girls, 4 guys, 2 little boys, and 1 baby girl. In the past we have rented a couple of condos, but this year we found an extra large condo that has 8 bedrooms and 7 bathrooms. It has been so fun to be all together! Growing up in a big family, it was very normal when we went on vacation for some of us to sleep on sleeping bags on the floor or on couches. For the first time that we can ever remember there are 4 people with their own rooms and we actually have extra beds that aren't even being slept in! It sort of feels "empty!" Just kidding!

The weather has been gorgeous, too! It has been sunny and very warm! We have been enjoying lots of food, tons of games, and great outlet shopping!

Update on the PJ Party!

A huge THANK YOU to all of you who participated in the PJ Party for the children in Mexico! It turned into a huge success for the kids! Here's a link to a few pictures from the party.

Merry Christmas

Merry Christmas to you! As we celebrate the birth of Jesus tomorrow we will be surrounded by our families--opening presents, eating good food, playing games, laughing, and our hearts will be full of joy! I have looked forward to tomorrow for a while now--I can't wait to watch the wonder of Christmas unfold for my sweet little Riley boy!

But, there will be a piece of my heart that will still be a little sad as I think about our sweet baby #2 and wonder if he or she has been born yet and if we're missing his/her first Christmas. In some ways I hope that our baby has been born because it means we're that much closer, but this mama's heart also can't bear to think that we might be missing the first Christmas that little one is alive for.

I heard this Third Day song last Christmas and it melted my heart...I think about it now as I think about our next baby and as I try to focus on all of the Christmases we will have together as a family.

"There's a little girl trembling on a cold December morn
Crying for momma's arms
At an orphanage just outside a little China town
There the forgotten are

But half a world away I hang the stockings by the fire
And dream about the day when I can finally call you mine

It's Christmas time again but you're not home
Your family is here and yet you're somewhere else alone
And so tonight I pray that God will come and hold you in his arms
And tell you from my heart I wish you Merry Christmas

As I hang the tinsel on the tree and watch the twinkling lights
I'm warmed by the fire's glow
Outside the children tumble in a wonderland of white,
Make angels in the snow

But half a world away you try your best to fight the tears
And hope that heaven's angels come to carry you here

It's Christmas time again but you're not home
Your family is here and yet you're somewhere else alone
And so tonight I pray that God will come and hold you in his arms
And tell you from my heart I wish you Merry Christmas

Christmas is a time to celebrate the holy child
and we celebrate his perfect gift of love
He came to earth to give his life
and prepare a place for us
so we could have a home with him above

It's Christmas time again and now you're home
Your family is here so you will never be alone
So tonight before you go to sleep, I'll hold you in my arms
And I'll tell you from my heart, and I'll you from my heart
I wish you Merry Christmas"

The Most Wonderful Time of the Year

It IS the most wonderful time of the year, although in our household it's a little bit less than wonderful. Riley has been under the weather and now has bronchitis. Ugh! This is not how I pictured our last few days before Christmas. I am just thankful he doesn't have the throw-up bug! At least we can all sit around and watch movies and eat yummy Christmas treats!

In many ways this Christmas is not how I pictured it would be. We've had a lot of disappointing news in the last month that I don't want to go into right now on my blog. I really thought we would have had good news to share and be excited about this year as we gathered to celebrate. But, things have not worked out the way that we would have planned.

In all of this I do know that God is in control and that He can be trusted with our lives and in the plans He has for us and our family. And, our circumstances do not change the miracle of why we celebrate this week--that God chose to give us the ultimate gift of life forever with Him through the birth of His son Jesus. Through that gift, one day we can look forward to the day when we will be with Him and there will be no more tears, no more pain, no more suffering, and no more disappointments. THAT makes this time of year the most wonderful time as we remember all we've been given and the "so much more" we have to look forward to!

Infertility and Adoption

In response to a question about infertility and adoption, I thought I would share a little bit more about our struggle with infertility.

For many people, they are given a diagnosis of their infertility but for a lot of us our infertility is "unexplained." We have pretty much had every test, exam, procedure, etc... to find out why we were having problems getting pregnant but no one has been able to find anything wrong/abnormal with us. And, we have been to general ob/gyns as well as reproductive endocrinologists.

We did get pregnant once and lost that baby very early on. After that we thought it would just be a matter of time before we were able to conceive again, but that has been over 4 years ago. (Wow--I hadn't thought about how long ago that was until I just typed it...so much has happened in 4 years.)

I had always wanted to adopt...when Michael and I were dating and before we were engaged we both remember me asking him if he would be open to adopting one day. He said he was open to it, but at that time he honestly never thought much about it.

After trying on our own and then later when our fertility meds and procedures weren't working, we really felt strongly "why are we continuing this when we ultimately just want to be parents and there are children who need us?" This isn't to say that once we decided to adopt that we have never felt sad about our infertility--there are definitely days, definitely moments where we have to recognize the loss of being able to conceive and carry a baby. BUT, those days and moments are fewer and far between.

For us, the bottom line came down to our desire. Our desire was to be parents. More than anything else we just wanted to be Mom and Dad. Our ultimate desire was not to have a labor story; our ultimate desire was not to have little replicas of ourselves running around; our ultimate desire was not to pass on our genes. All of those would be great, but it came down to our ultimate desire of being parents.

Becoming parents has been the fulfillment of our dreams...we don't in ANY way feel "slighted" or "less parents" because we became parents through adoption rather than through giving birth. Grieving for the child you never birthed or the loss of the dream that one day you will birth children is a process. I think it is very rare that a couple would never (even if in a very small way) feel sadness or grief that those dreams haven't come true and probably won't come true. But, I also know that that pain, grief, and sadness are not experienced as intensely forever. Time and more than time, Jesus, can take those places in our lives and turn those places of mourning into JOY!

(If you are struggling with infertility, I would love to talk to you! I certainly do not have all of the answers, but I do understand, and would love to encourage you in any way that I can. Also, if you are thinking about adopting or know someone who is, I would love to help you, too, in any way that I can. Drop me an email at: erin0302@hotmail.com)

Why Korea? Why International Adoption?

As a Christian I really believe that God puts certain desires in certain people's hearts. I think that we were also created with certain passions, likes and dislikes, etc... No one is created exactly alike.

Some families who are interested in adoption may have a bent towards adoption in America; others are drawn overseas to international adoption. For us, we really felt pulled towards international adoption. If I'm being honest, part of the pull for us was the perceived safety of the process. I say perceived because it is very unusual for a birthmother to change her mind when adopting internationally; however, there are still so many uncertainties with timeframes and other changing parts. I know that there are successful domestic adoptions every single day, but I also know that the potential for heartbreak is big with a birth family changing their mind and deciding to parent rather than making an adoption plan. After our loss and infertility struggles, we wanted an option that was as close to a sure thing as possible.

We also really felt a pull towards adopting from an Asian country. We first thought we would adopt from China because that was the most familiar to us and we have several friends/acquaintances with children from China. Once we started gathering info about the process we found out that we were too young because we both had to be at least 30 years old and neither of us were at the time. Vietnam was another option but international adoption from Vietnam had been closed for a while and was just beginning again; again this seemed too risky for my heart at the time. (Adoptions from Vietnam have since been stopped again.) Then we learned about Korea.

We loved everything we found out about Korea. Korea has the world's oldest international adoption program. Most of the children are in foster families as opposed to orphanages; this means that there is a lot of one-on-one interaction between the children and their foster moms/parents. Being in a foster family also gives a baby a greater chance of bonding which then eventually helps them bond with the adoptive family. Korea has excellent medical care, too. At the time when we began the process for Riley the process also was fairly quick which was very appealing to us after desiring to be parents for so long.

With Korea it is very, very rare (I can only think of one instance I have heard of) for a sibling set to be available for adoption. Usually if it were a sibling set it would be a set of twins, but very rarely siblings of different ages. In our homestudy (which is sent to Korea) we have only requested one child at this time. This doesn't mean that we would never be open to adopting more than one child at a time, but at this point our plan for this second adoption is just one child. I would still love a big family, but Michael and I are taking things one child at a time and we will see what God has planned for our family.

Right now our hearts are still for children in Korea, but we are definitely open to wherever God leads our family in the future.

Talking about Adoption with Your Kids

A great question was asked in my Question and Answer post about whether to discuss with your children the fact that Riley (or insert any of your children's friends' names who were adopted) was adopted.

I honestly had never really thought about this until the question was asked here. I have pondered it and have also asked for other people's input from one of my adoption message boards. The consensus seems to be to follow your child's lead. In other words, wait for them to initiate conversations about adoption (or why some children don't "look" like their mommy or daddy) and answer their questions (on an age appropriate level) as they ask. As your children start asking questions, talk to your friends who have adopted if you need suggestions on what to say.

There are also some GREAT children's books about the topic of adoption. One of our favorites is My Family is Forever.


This is a great book for our family because one of the topics talked about is how families don't always look alike. It is a great children's book in general and would be a great purchase for any family. For those of you we know in "real life" (hahahaha!) this would be a great book to have on hand as your children grow up and start asking questions about adoption.

Even though this wasn't a part of the original question, I do want to say that we talk to Riley all the time about his story. All research has shown and experts say that children who were adopted should be told that from a very young age. Since we are Caucasian and Riley is Asian it would not be long before he would notice that he looks different than us. Most children begin noticing the difference around 3 or 4. But, we never want Riley to have "that moment" where he remembers finding out he was adopted as though it were a bad thing or something to have been kept a secret. We feel quite the opposite!

We began talking to Riley about how he became a part of our family since the time he first came home. It was wonderful to have that time to talk to him and figure out exactly how we would tell him his story while he was still young. Now Riley can tell you about how he was born in Korea, his foster mother Mrs. Park took good care of him and sent him a hanbok, he flew in a big airplane with Miss Kim, and Mommy and Daddy were SO excited to hold him for the first time at the airport! It has been so fun to live near an airport because we drive by it almost daily. It has been great for Riley to see the planes and then just very naturally talk about the day he flew in a big airplane and joined our family.

Incorporating Korean Culture

Another question asked in my Question and Answer post was what we do to incorporate Korean culture into our family. (Becky, I'm not sure that you will get much out of this answer because it's probably no different than what you guys do/have done.)

One of the first things we did was celebrate Riley's first birthday with a Tol ceremony. There are four main parts to the Tol: praying and giving thanks, making and wearing the birthday clothes, preparing the table and performing the Toljabee, and sharing the food with guests and neighbors.

We had our families and a few close friends over for Riley's tol. The first thing we did was have a time of blessing for him (praying and giving thanks). We invited people to speak blessings over him through prayers and/or Scripture readings. Riley wore his hanbok (making and wearing the birthday clothes) that his foster mom had sent home with him.



Next, we performed the Toljabee. During the Toljabee a child sits at a table where the parents have placed a variety of items. The child then chooses an item or items that they are attracted to. The child's future is supposedly predicted by the items they choose. Riley chose scissors (talented with his hands) and a knife (a good cook).



Another thing we do to incorporate Korean culture into our home is by celebrating Children's Day each year. Children's Day is a Korean national holiday celebrated on May 5th each year. In Korea there are usually parades and a lot of fun kid places offer free admission on Children's Day. Parents also buy gifts for their children. We have celebrated two Children's Days since Riley came home. On the first one we bought him a gift and took him out for dinner. On the second one we bought him a fishing pole and had some of his friends over for lunch/playdate and cupcakes.

Michael and I also have tried to learn more about the Korean culture through reading and talking with other Koreans. We plan to take our children to Korea for a family trip when they are old enough to remember being there and would get a lot out of the experience. In our area there are also Korean culture camps for children adopted from Korea. Once Riley is old enough to attend we will definitely check this opportunity out.

We are obviously not Korean but we want to celebrate Riley's heritage as well as we possibly can. No adoptee is exactly the same. There are those who are grown who embrace their original heritage and who wish their parents had done more in this aspect; there are others who identify only with their adopted heritage. Until Riley is old enough to decide which he prefers, we feel like we owe it to him and to his birth family to try to incorporate as best we can aspects of his Korean heritage.

Favorite Blogs

Thank you for the questions I received after my last post. I will take the next few days to answer the questions that were asked. (It's not too late if you want to still leave me a question and I will try to answer it. Here's the original post.)

The first question was what are some of my favorite blogs of people who are not my friends "in real life." These are some of the blogs I read consistently that I think you might want to check out:

Really Living

Urban Servant

The Stitch that Makes the Sweater Perfect

Spirit of Adoption

Bring the Rain

My Charming Kids

Also, don't forget you can become a fan of our blog by clicking on "Follow this blog" on my right sidebar.

What about you? Not that I NEED more blogs to read (ask my sweet husband!) but what are some blogs you enjoy reading?

Question and Answer Time

Now I want to open up the "blog floor" for questions that I will try to answer. The questions can be adoption related or you can ask questions about me/my family. Don't be shy! Let me hear from you!!! (This won't be much fun if there aren't any questions, so step right up!)

Your "Own" Children

Adoption Awareness Month (part 6)

**Don't forget about the PJ Party!!**

One of the things that most people may not know but is incredibly offensive (not to mention just rude) to an adoptive family is when people say something about your "own" children. I cannot tell you how many people have asked us if we ever wanted our "own" children or when we're going to have our "own" children. Some of you may not know but I am the oldest of nine children. I have had people ask me why I have had problems having my "own" children since my parents obviously did not.

This implication that somehow Riley is not our own is not only rude but is also ignorant. A child in an adoptive family belongs no less to his parents than one who happens to share his parents' DNA. When you say "own" children in contrasting someone's "adopted" children it makes it sound like the adopted children are just being borrowed or that they are not a permanent part of the family.

Usually when someone asks the questions about our "own" children what they are trying to understand is what led us to adoption and what our future plans are for growing our family. There are other ways to ask this then to bring the term "own children" into the discussion. By simply asking things like "what led you to adoption?" or "do you think you will adopt again?" you are showing an interest in an adoptive family's story in a sensitive way.

PJ Party

Adoption Awareness Month (part 5)

That's right...you are invited to a pj party. An adoptive family from one of my online adoption boards lives in Mexico and work at an outreach center helping women, children, and families in need. Another adoptive family from this same message board has visited and had this to say:

"When in Mexico what amazed me was the poverty the kids in "B's" church neighborhood endure. What's more, in the fall/winter these kids are all running around sick with runny noses and bronchitis because they have minimal blankets and no heat in their houses and in the winter it gets in the low 40's or worse. These kids don't even have warm p.j.'s to sleep in. This last visit one of the kids was given a pair of pajamas. She had NEVER owned anything new or a pair of jammies before and she was so proud of them that she wore them to the Youth group meeting that night. That's right...she went in her jammies. After talking with "B" we discussed what a blessing it would be if the kids in the neighborhood could have one set of warm pajamas for the holidays."

If you would like to donate a pair of pjs, please leave me a comment with your email address and I will send you the address of where you can mail the pjs or if you order online where you can have the pjs shipped! Sizes 2T to 12 are most needed; boy or girl pjs.

National Adoption Month (part 4)

I have begun reading this woman's blog and am inspired by her and her husband's hearts for orphans.

Recently they were interviewed for this show. It only takes a few minutes to watch but I hope it will touch your heart like it has touched mine.

National Adoption Month (part 3)

One way you can start a conversation with your children is to talk through these questions during your dinner time tonight. (This is taken from Family Life's "Cry of the Orphan" website).

Around the dinner table discuss the following: Are we rich, poor or middle class? How do we know?

Read these statements
- 50% of all the workers in the entire world (that’s 1.4 billion people) live on less than $2 per day
- 1 billion people in our world do not have access to clean water
- Does your family own a car? If so, you are among the elite 8% of people. 92% if the world's population does not own a car.
By the world's standards… if we earn more than $2 dollars a day, have access to clean drinking water and own a car… guess what! We are rich!

Read James 1:27 “Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world.”

Respond to these statements
- What’s an orphan? Who are the fatherless in our world?
o Orphan – a child who has lost one and/or both of their parents
o In an age of instant communication…of hyper entertainment…of information explosion and saturation…how many of us know that there are now more than 143 million orphans
across the globe?
o That every 14 seconds an AIDS death causes another child to become an orphan?
o That there are more than 118,000 children available right now to be adopted in the United States. Do any of us know an orphan?

- Does God care for orphans in our world? What does His word say about orphans?
o “Vindicate the weak and fatherless; do justice to the afflicted and destitute. Rescue the weak and needy; deliver them out of the hand of the wicked.” Psalm 82:3-4
o “Wash yourselves, make yourselves clean; remove the evil of your deeds from My sight. Cease to do evil, learn to do good; seek justice, reprove the ruthless, defend the orphan, plead for the widow." Isaiah 1:16-17

- Orphans live in foster care homes down our street, in state run orphanages and unfortunately on the street.
o How would your life be different if you did not have a Mom or Dad or both?
o God’s Word instructs us to care for orphans. How would you feel if you were an orphan who felt uncared for by this world? Would God seem real to you in that kind of world?

- How could our family care for orphans in our town, nation and the world?
- What would you be willing to give up to care for orphans in our world?

Closing prayer – “God show us ways we can care for orphans right here in our town, in our nation and around the world. Help us to understand how rich we are in the resources of this world. Give us your heart for most vulnerable in our world so we can make a difference for the orphan.

National Adoption Month (part 2)

Positive adoption language helps to clear up misconceptions about adoption. By using positive adoption language, the hope is that people would be better educated about adoption. Below are just a few terms that are commonly used...spreading misconceptions about adoption.

Just like in all aspects of life, no one says everything perfectly and chances are that when you talk about adoption you may not know exactly the right things to say. But, for me, it means a lot that you are willing to have a conversation about adoption. Through conversations we are able to learn more about adoption, dispel some of the myths and fears surrounding adoption, and hopefully begin to change a world where some boys and girls have no mommy or daddy.

Positive Adoption Language:
Birthparent (positive) versus Real parent (negative)
Biological parent (positive) versus Natural parent (negative)
Birth child (positive) versus Own child (negative)
My child (positive) versus Adopted child; own child (negative)
Terminate parental rights (positive) versus Give up (negative)
To parent (positive) versus To keep (negative)

National Adoption Month

November is National Adoption Month. While we continue to wait for God to add our second child to our family (stay tuned...that is going to be another post at a later date) I thought I would take some time over the next few weeks to talk about adoption and why it's so important that everyone be involved in some way caring for the orphan.

If you claim to be a Christian, you have an obligation to do SOMETHING for the orphan. James 1:27 “Pure and lasting religion in the sight of God our Father means that we must care for orphans and widows in their troubles."

This does NOT mean that everyone should adopt, but I think it does mean that everyone should be doing something to help the plight of orphans. Over the next few weeks I want to share with you practical things that you can do to help. With more than 130 million orphans it is going to take all of us working together, one child at a time.

I also hope that over the next few weeks, that if you have questions about adopting or orphans that you will feel free to leave me comments and I will try to answer your questions as best as I can.

The other day I was on the phone with my friend Christy. When I got off the phone Riley asked me who I was talking to. I told him that I was talking to my friend Christy. I reminded him that Miss Christy is Lily and Lincoln's mommy. He said, "Lincoln was a TALL man! He had a big, big chair."

Obviously, the Lincoln Memorial made some kind of impression on this 2 year old!

Please, GO VOTE today! And, PRAY that God will have mercy on our country. Our children and future generations will be strongly affected by the outcome of the election today. I am personally praying for a miracle. Won't you join me?

Just a few PICTURES from our WEEKEND in DC!!

One of Riley's favorite things--riding the carousel out on the Mall!

Riley fell asleep on our way to the White House. Maybe on our next trip he will see it!



Family picture at sunset


Family picture with McCain and Palin :)


Me and my incredible husband :)

Another fun day in DC! We have been having a great time and have had just awesome weather! Today was so sunny and warm--it has been wonderful! Riley missed a nap today, so he went to bed early (around 10pm...well, it is earlier than last night!).

I can't wait to show some of the pictures we've taken! Today we met MCCAIN and PALIN!! Okay, maybe they were cardboard cutouts but it was still fun to pose with them for a picture! ;)

Some of the other funny things from our trip...

Yesterday we were in the Air and Space Museum and this little boy dressed up in a Super Mario costume came up beside Riley to look at an exhibit. Riley turned toward him and said, "Hey, hey are you Mario?" It was hilarious to hear Riley say that and even funnier to see this little boy who was probably 7 or 8 look at this little boy with an expression like "are you talking to me?" What 2 year old knows who Super Mario is?

Then, in the same museum we got on an elevator operated by a security guard. As soon as we rolled Riley's stroller in he said, "Hey, Mr. Policeman where's your car?" Then, Riley proceeded to tell him that we were getting ready to ride on the spaceship. (Aka the spaceship model that you can walk through in the museum).

Today we went on a Duck tour of the city. It was a lot of fun; we rode in an amphibious vehicle. Half of the tour we were on the road and then the vehicle pulled up the wheels and became a boat and we were on the Potomac.

Overall, it has been a very fun day! Riley was a little freaked out by some of the big statues--primarily Thomas Jefferson, Abraham Lincoln, and Roosevelt. I tried to tell him they were just statues of some of our former Presidents but for some reason he wasn't too impressed.

We are having a fun time in Washington, D.C.!! We have had beautiful weather and really enjoyed our day. Riley is still quite the trooper. He napped a little in the stroller around 5pm and just crashed for the night around 11. His favorite thing so far has been riding the "fast train" aka the Metro. We have some great pictures, but I forgot my camera cord, so those will have to wait.

**If you haven't checked out my blog in a few days, I actually have been posting regularly (gasp) so please don't miss the posts below!!**

At my cousin's wedding this past weekend we took a family picture. We were just missing my sister Meredith who is living and working in Seattle.



Everyone is a sister or brother unless otherwise noted. From left to right (front row): Kaitlin (15); Mason (Ben and Jenna's son who is 2); Jenna (Ben's wife); Laila (Ben and Jenna's daughter who is almost 3 months old); me; Meghan (9); Susannah (28); Annie (13); Karoline (25).

From left to right (back row): John (18); Ben; Riley (2); Michael (my husband); Mom; Dad

In the past few weeks we have moved Riley to his new bedroom and his big boy bed! He has done great. Riley still hasn't figured out that if he wants to he can get out of his bed and his room. Instead he yells to us to come and get him. It is wonderful! We will see how long this lasts, but while it does we are thankful!

Here are some pictures from Riley's first night in a big boy bed!

I'm Back...

I took a brief blogging break, but I am back!

Tonight was my cousin Kristin's wedding. Kristin was a beautiful bride! We had a wonderful time with family. Kristin asked Riley to be her ringbearer. The rehearsal Friday evening was a little rocky but when the ceremony rolled around he got his act together and did a great job walking down the aisle.

Here are some pictures from the evening!





Riley and his cousin Mason

Too much to do Friday, so here is just a picture...

Out of the Mouths of Babes...

This afternoon I was on the verge of tears about something very, very dumb. Riley picked up on this and said to me, "Mommy, don't be frustrated. Jesus will give you peace."

It is amazing to me the things that we have taught this precious 2 year old that he is now repeating back and encouraging us with.

NC State

This afternoon we head to Raleigh to watch the Wolfpack play. The game starts at 7:30, but we are heading out earlier to tailgate with my sister Karoline and her roommate Taylor. My dad and my brother John are coming with us, too! We have season tickets that we share with another couple, so this is our first game of the season. We can't wait!!!

NOTE TO SELF...

When locking the van (yes, I don't think I ever posted that I now drive my "dream car" a Honda minivan!! And, I am NOT being sarcastic...I have always, always, always wanted a minivan to FILL with children. Michael was okay with the minivan...I am still working on the "full of children" part!!) do NOT manually lock the doors, instead use the nice feature attached to the key called a remote. This ensures that your keys make it out of the van before it's locked!

Only 3 More Days...

Until Riley gets to see the Wolfpack play!! After a great win last weekend we are excited about this Saturday--despite all of the team injuries, we still believe!! :)

October 2006

Adventure in the Great Outdoors

For those of you who know me in "real life" this post may surprise you!

This weekend Michael, Riley, and I went CAMPING!! (Stop laughing!!) We had SO much fun! And, yes, we were camping outside in a tent, in sleeping bags, and I didn't pack one toiletry! (Well, does hand sanitizer count as a toiletry??? If it does, then I did bring one...)

We headed out Saturday afternoon after watching the NC State game (GO PACK!! What a win!!!) We first went to Hanging Rock, but there were no campsites left. The park ranger was very helpful and said that he had heard over at Pilot Mountain that they had a few campsites still left but just a handful. We booked it over to Pilot Mountain (about 25 minutes away from Hanging Rock). When we got there only 2 campsites were still available.

Everyone around us had already set up their tents and their sites for the night. We quickly got to work on setting up the tent. My dad was so nice to let us borrow his tent. His infamous words were that this new tent of his was "very, very easy to set up." After probably about an hour, we did finally get the tent up. (Dad, don't look!)




So, after getting the tent set-up well enough that we could get in it to sleep for the night without worrying too much that it might fall on top of us, it was time to eat! Michael made a fire and we had a blast roasting hot dogs, eating chips, and then making smores! Riley really, really enjoyed it all. He was sooooooo excited to see the fire and to eat his favorite food (hot dogs)!

The two highlights for Riley were getting to sleep in his brand new Cars sleeping bag and getting to carry a flashlight around. We all really had a fun time being together and enjoyed a fun family weekend. I think I am willing to even go back again another time...just for one night and as long as my dad shows us next time how to set up the tent!! :)

UPDATE from yesterday's post...

Ahhhhh...what a wonderful Friday....the non-napper decided that today would be a good day to snooze. Hooray, maybe we are back to being...

The Non-Napper

Riley decided almost 2 weeks ago that he was finished with napping. I have tried my best to disagree with this decision, but so far Mama ain't winning! In the past two weeks he has only taken 2, maybe 3 naps. This makes for a very long day!

I am still putting him in his crib and trying to make him nap the first 30-45 minutes, when that doesn't work I go back in and give him a handful of books. Yesterday, when Michael got home from work I was sharing that afternoon's nap woes and Riley interrupted to say that he only wanted ONE book at a time. Sorry, I don't see that happening.

The good thing is that he's not trying to climb out of his crib, he just yells for me most of the time. This is one mom who is really missing the 2 to 2 1/2 hour break I used to enjoy. Sigh.

Here are pictures from the napping baby I miss!! (Taken the first week Riley was home in 2006).

Today we celebrate Riley's 2nd Gotcha Day! 2 years ago today he was carried off of a plane in Detroit and handed to us. Our lives have truly never been the same. Riley is a treasure and we cannot imagine our family without him. Today we are celebrating by making airplane cookies and then we are taking him to Chuck E Cheese for pizza and games.

I came across this on another adoptive mom's blog. It really sums up well the love we feel for our son. Below it is the link to the video we made for Riley's first birthday...we have posted it before but it really captures the essence of September 13th, 2 years ago!

We Are So Blessed
by Brenna Fay Rhodes
copyright 1997

We are so blessed. We have the opportunity to pray and wait and plan and hope and dream and work for our child. Circumstances don't allow us to take our child for granted ~ ever. We do all these things for so long and at such great emotional cost, that when our child is finally in our arms, we truly cherish every minute. Every second.

We are blessed to be in our child's life. We are blessed that God planned for us to be a family, and that we were given the opportunities that brought us together. We get to see all the best parts of mankind in our wonderful children. All the goodness and potential and innocence and ambition and confidence and love. And what a beautiful sight that is.

We are blessed to have run this race. It is long, and very often it is practically impossible to complete. But we run anyway, and believe in ourselves and our child enough to the do the impossible. We run, knowing that at the end of this great race, a child is waiting for a chance at a wonderful life. And we get to be the ones to give him that life. Wow.

We are blessed that when our child laughs, we are the ones to hear it. And when our child cries, we are the ones she looks for. When our child feels pain or joy or accomplishment or excitement, he shares it with us. We are needed and wanted. And we are blessed.

We are so blessed to have had the chance to see life from a different angle. To see that things don't always go as you planned them out in 5th grade ~ because there are better things in store. To be part of the few who feel constantly misunderstood. To be the one always on guard against the rude or ignorant comment. To feel the frustration of not having the perfect comeback to that comment until three hours later. Our kids can use those experiences and lessons we have learned. We are deeper, stronger, more compassionate people because of this journey. And the world our children live in is better, because we grow in those ways.

Our child is blessed. He is patted and hugged and nestled and rocked and kissed and squeezed and taught and tickled and corrected and praised. He is told he is precious in God's eyes. She is certain of her value in our eyes. And she never wonders if she will be cared for tomorrow or the next day. She sleeps comfortably at night, safe in our care.

We should tell our children we are proud. We saved and scrimped, prayed and begged, planned and schemed, worked and worried. We hoped endlessly for them. We dedicated years of our lives to finding them, followed God's path to them, waited in His time for them, then brought them home to their forever family. We gave our whole hearts to our child, even before we ever saw his precious face. Now that is love. And parents who adopt know all about that.

Click on this:RILEY'S HOMECOMING VIDEO

Nesting...

I think I am in official nesting mode. I have always heard this talked about for women who are pregnant and I know I definitely did this while waiting for Riley. I still haven't bought anything for this baby because our baby seems so far away (and practically speaking because I already have some cute baby things from when Riley came home). So, the fact that I am nesting is a good sign to me that one day our home will have another baby.

I googled the term "nesting" and this is what I found:

Each woman will nest in a way that is unique to them. Below is a list of possible things a nesting mother will do.

Clean out the cabinets
Mop the floor
Rearrange furniture
Clean out closets
Clean a child’s nursery meticulously
Steam clean upholstery and carpets
Clean the bathroom
Stock the kitchen with food
Cook

Two weeks ago I cooked and froze 25 meals, so I can check the cooking and the stock the kitchen with food off of the list.

I am currently in the process of going through every room in the house and pulling out everything and either trashing, donating, or putting back. I am not one to keep a lot of junk around anyway, but you should see how much I am getting rid of! It is so much fun!

The article then goes on to say:

Nesting is normal and it is not hard on a woman’s health unless she exhausts herself.

Pregnancy normally will hamper a woman from doing things which are truly too strenuous. However, if a woman is nesting and trying to push a piano across a room, it is probably best if she finds something else to do.

I guess that is one of the perks of adopting....if I decide to push my piano across the family room I can and won't need to "find something else to do!"

It's Football Season...

Hooray! We love this time of year because it means lots of football! We are (of course!) diehard NC State fans. Right now, our team is 1-1....but it looks like it might be another rough year.

We will be taking Riley to his first game of the season the last Saturday in September...only 2 weeks away!

Here's some pictures of our favorite little Wolfpacker:

We have had a fun long weekend! Went by way too fast! Michael's aunt, uncle, and 2 of his cousins came to town for the weekend. We went to the water park Saturday and had a great time!

On Friday, Michael and I got a new mattress set. It is soooooooo comfy! (I may never get out of bed again!) :)

Riley got to move to the 2 year old class at church 2 weeks ago. He loves his new class! We ask him what he likes about his new class and his answer is "Goldfish!" Evidently, at snack time they get goldfish in this class instead of Ritz crackers. The other thing that he says he likes about the class is that in the bathroom there is a short, little potty. This Sunday he told us that "Them lets me stand up to go potty." (If his teachers or those in the preschool department read this blog, please know that yes, I think he is also getting the message of the Bible stories so please don't feel that your efforts go unnoticed! It just seems that this little boy--at this point in his life--is really into the goldfish and the potty!)

Here are some pictures of sweet little Riles:

Where Are We in the Process for Baby #2?
One word: S L O W

Just thought I would post an update on our process to adopt baby #2 for those of you who may be new to following our adoption journey. 14 months and 1 week ago we sent in our initial application to AIAA. This is the agency we used to adopt Riley through. In January (after waiting for over 7 months and still on the waiting list just to apply) we received a letter that said that adoptions through their agency were slowing down and they really couldn't be sure when families on the waiting list would even be able to apply to the Korea program.

We spent some time thinking, praying, and researching what our options were. We decided to switch agencies and are now working with another agency. This agency accepted all of our paperwork that had already been completed but then we had additional forms and coursework to complete. On March 4th all of our paperwork was processed and we began officially waiting for a referral.

Waiting for a referral is the point in the process where we still are. The referral is when we are matched with our baby. At that point we will receive pictures, background information, etc... We were originally told an estimate of 0-5 months for our wait. We are now close to the 6 month mark. Our phone could ring with good news at any second, or it could still be a few more months. With adoption, you just never know!

The waiting continues to be HARD! But, when that phone rings and our lives are forever changed (again!) most of the heartache of the waiting disappears.

How to Confuse a 2 Year Old...

Poor little Riley has a stomach bug--thankfully he's not throwing up, he just has very loose stools. As you are more than well aware, we are in the midst of potty training. Talk about confusing your potty training toddler....

Yes, Riley, normally you do get some M&Ms when you go pee pee in the potty, but not today.

Yes, Riley, normally you get to open a present when you poop in the potty, but not today. (Not to be gross, but at one point he was pooping every half hour...at that rate I would have been bankrupt!)

Tomorrow is a new day!

Buy 1, Get 1 FREE!!

There is an incredible deal going on right now here. You can buy one Thomas the Train dvd and get the 2nd one of equal or lesser value free! There is also free shipping.

It doesn't look like there is a limit to how many you can buy. Happy Shopping!!!

How can the summer really be almost over? Actually, because no one in our household is in school, summer is more just a season and being in the south it will still feel like summer for a while longer. But, it feels like summer is almost over as other kids are preparing/going back to school, our summer hangout (the waterpark) will be closing soon, our vacations are over, and we're getting ready to start our fall activities.

It is also a little disappointing because I really thought that by now I would be the mommy of two. I know we are so close that I can almost touch it, but it still seems so far away.

The family who was one day ahead of us in having their paperwork approved by our agency, received their referral a week ago Friday. We are out of state, so we are on a different list than they are, but it is still hopeful and exciting to know that they were matched.

Please pray for us--for peace in the waiting and that our baby would be matched with us soon!

Potty Training Progress Report

Well, I'm sure that you are wondering how the potty training is going...actually, I can't think of anything else to blog about tonight, so here it goes.

We officially started last Tuesday. Riley and I went to Target and he picked out some "big boy underwear." (After growing up with so many sisters, it's hard for me not to call them panties, but I am resisting the urge and calling them underwear.) Riley was so proud!

It has gone fairly well. He's not afraid of sitting on the potty and he loves the candy treats he gets when he goes to the potty. He's only told me a couple of times that he needs to go but for the most part he's staying dry. There have been a few times that I have wanted to quit but with some encouragement from my friend Jen and my mom, I am trying to stick with it.

Some memorable potty training moments (so far):

1)Riley choosing a new potty seat at Target. I tried to encourage him to buy the more boyish one of Cars, but he insisted on the Dora seat.
2) At the YMCA I was in the bathroom stall and Riley starts cheering at the top of his lungs "Yay, Mommy! Woo-hoo!!"
3) Riley running towards me at Sears saying "Oh, no!" as his crocs start filling up with pee. (Seriously, he had more liquid in his shoes than in his shorts! Thank goodness they were his washable crocs!)

Stay tuned for more riveting potty details!! :)

The Olympics...

Do you get excited about the Olympics? I do! I cannot wait! I love watching all of the events, even if it's a sport I don't typically care for.

I love the competition, and I love how athletes are competing for the pride of their nations.

The only thing I don't like is when the Olympics are in such a different time zone because I am always afraid that during the day I am going to find out who won which competitions before it is shown on tv. I will be listening to something on talk radio (yes, I listen to talk radio) and they will interrupt for a newsbreak and before I can turn the volume down I will hear and "so and so just won the gold medal in..." Ruins my day! What is your favorite thing about the Olympics?

For the love of a milkshake...

On Saturday night my sisters Susannah and Karoline came in to town to see our new niece Laila. After we left the hospital we decided to go by Cookout for milkshakes. (Cookout has the best milkshakes you've ever tasted!)

Riley has become a bit of a milkshake hoarder and you're lucky if you get your shake back once he has it in his hands! I wasn't very hungry so I was sharing my Oreo Mint shake with him.

We needed gas, so Michael pulled into one of our local stations. Before he got out of the car he noticed that Riley had punctured the cup with the straw and the milkshake was leaking all over his clothes. In an effort to save the milkshake for me (since at this point I had barely had a sip--remember the 2 year old milkshake hoarder!) Michael ran into the store with the leaking milkshake and grabbed one of the cups from the drink station.

After dumping the milkshake into the new cup, Michael then went and waited in a very long line so that he could pay for the cup. He said he was tempted to drop a quarter on the counter and leave, but he wanted to tell the clerk what he had done.

When it was his turn in line he explained to the clerk "Tiffany" (actually her name, after the incident definitely not trying to protect her name)what had happened and that he would be glad to pay for the cup. She then told Michael that if he had filled the cup up with ice it would have cost him 15 cents but since it was just the cup it would be 94 cents. Michael looked at her and repeated back to her what she had just said and said something to the effect of that doesn't make much sense and how could she charge 94 cents for an empty cup? She copped an attitude and told him that they had to pay for the cups somehow.

Michael, being the honest and upstanding citizen that he is, paid her the 94 cents and then asked for her manager's name and her name. Somehow, "Tiffany" couldn't remember her manager's full name. Shocking....

So, consider this a warning blog post...if you ever need an empty cup from a convenience store be sure to fill it up with ice--it's cheaper than just the empty cup!

Another addition...

My brother Ben and his wife Jenna had their second baby yesterday! Laila Cassidy was born around lunchtime and weighed 7 lbs. 13 ozs.

Ben, Jenna, big brother Mason and sweet Laila are all doing great! Here are some pictures!

So, I don't really have anything very interesting or "newsy" to put on my blog tonight, but the toilet picture was starting to bother me so I decided to just post something so that when I look at my blog I don't see the shiny porcelain staring at me!

This past week has been a hard week...Riley was sick over the weekend, then Michael caught the same virus the night before his birthday and he was at home sick for 2 full days (including his b'day), then I had some not-fun things I had to deal with, etc...

Plus, I really think that the waiting for our referral is really starting to get to me. Originally we were told to expect a 0-5 month wait...now we're about a week away from the end of the 5 month wait with no end in sight. It's so discouraging. It's probably a lot like being pregnant and being past your due date, except that it is different because when you're pregnant and late you know your doctor will only let you go so long--maybe an extra week or two. With adoption, you could be waiting another several months or even longer--there is no guaranteed end in sight. Sigh.

I know that in the end it is all going to be more than worth it...I have a precious 2 year old who is a constant reminder of that...but the waiting is still hard. It's hard to put into words what it feels like to know your son or daughter has probably been born and you know nothing about where he is, what he's doing, when he will be with you, etc... All you can do is pray and ask God to please watch over him and keep him safe and healthy and bring him to you as soon as possible!

Well, I had been planning on potty-training once we get home from our family vacation but today sealed the deal. This morning Riley took off his diaper and ran into the bathroom saying he needed to go potty. I put him on there and sure enough he peed. He's been using the potty quite a bit lately but it's always with my asking him if he needs to go. This was one of the first times it was truly on his initiative. Once we get home from the beach I am planning to really jump into it...we'll see how it goes!